How To Be With Uncomfortable Emotions

simple healing tools Jun 14, 2018

Chances are, if you’re grieving, you’ve heard the saying “you’ve got to feel it to heal it.” The problem is, feeling it can be terrifying.

Last night in my free Facebook group Healing Grief Holistically, I led a meditation class called Relax your Emotional Body that addressed this head on.

We focussed on becoming aware of and allowing our uncomfortable emotions so we could invite in healing.

And, even though I prefaced the meditation by saying it would be a loving and safe experience, participants were still scared. They said things like, “I’m afraid to allow my emotions. I’m afraid if I do, they’ll consume me or cannibalize me.”

I get it. I’ve been there and allowing your emotions can definitely feel scary. Which is why this is even more important.

One of my favorite quotes comes from Carl Jung. It says, “what we resist persists.”  In this context, it means that when we resist uncomfortable emotions they persist. And to make matters worse, as we continue to push them down and add more on top, they get bigger. When there is no room left, they eventually erupt out of us like a volcano. If you are anything like me, this tends to happen at the most inopportune times. Like the time when I was waitressing and completely lost it when a customer had a problem with his grilled cheese sandwich. Luckily the manager was by best friend and knew (since my mom had recently died) it had nothing to do with the sandwich. ;)

By allowing uncomfortable emotions the space they need to flow through us as they occur, we make the healing process a bit gentler. And, we avoid moments like ‘the sandwich incident.’

In last night’s class, I gently guided participants through a 3 part process to make allowing uncomfortable emotions less scary. This example uses the feeling of sadness, but you can insert any emotion.

How To Be With Uncomfortable Emotions:

  1. Name the emotion. You can say,“I am feeling sad”
  2. Ground your energy. You can do this by feeling your feet on the ground, your bum on the chair, or your back on the bed. Notice the parts of your body in contact with the earth and let them settle in. Notice how you can be both grounded and sad.
  3. Give yourself a hug and as you allow the emotion to flow. Talk to yourself as though you were talking to someone who you love. You can say “I’m feeling sad, and that’s okay.”

When I finished guiding participants through this process, they left feeling much better. They said things like, “As usual, the anxiety leading up to something is way worse than the thing itself. Thank you. I needed that.”

To do this meditation yourself,  join us in our free private Facebook community.

Looking forward to seeing you there.

With LOVE,


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